the groin :: the ass :: 'str8-acting'

so while chit-chatting away in my normal sunday morning fashion to the randoms on my favorite gay chat site - gay.com - the subtle references to groin and ass came about in the conversation. why is it that as gay men - we are always referencing certain body parts in this delicate ballet of online banter? well let's face it - not all online conversations are delicate - most are like - what'cha into - wanna fuck - and my favorite - 'str8-acting for same - you in?' which leads me to the point of this post - 'str8-acting' - really now - i didn't realize straights and gays 'acted' one way or another. aren't we all supposed to just be ourselves and let the others sort us out?

in my lifetime - i've met many gay men who aren't the stereotypical gay that we are taught that we all are (reference: blaine edwards and antoine merryweather.) i fancy myself as being one of those men (the 'not so stereotypical') - though sometimes - i do ride that stereotype line - but that's what makes life fun right? on the other side of that coin - i have met many a heterosexual man - married with kids - who speak and strands pearls - matching pumps and purses - leap from their mouths they are so 'nelly.' so what is 'str8-acting?'

'str8-acting' i think is the gay male's insecurity being worn on their sleeves. it's the not-so passive way of breaking the sad stereotypes that plague us. by saying we are 'str8-acting' we pull ourselves closer to the norm or what society wishes we all were - how dull. be yourself. you can only be true to the truest you - and when you wear that on your sleeve - you'll be a better person for it.

gay men lose themselves in these crazy label games. forcing a mold on themselves. fortunately - though slowly - i do feel like the younger breed of gays are changing the rules a bit. kids are coming out at such earlier ages - 12 14 16 - and are able to express themselves closer to when actual puberty and hormones are in full swing. this allows them to establish identity in real-time and not have to reestablish it later in life. most gay men who are 30+ had to find themselves all over again. its a sad truth.

it makes me wonder how far into the future we'll have to go before 'str8-acting' is no longer necessary and we can all just be ourselves.